Friday, January 8, 2010

Shredding Day 4

Shred is Done! So wanting chocolate.....maybe a smoothie instead - Fridays are usually Pizza Noght - but after that lunch I passed it up and drank water - so I am off to make a smoothie!

Well I am proud of myself - I have made my workouts everyday since Tuesday. I am however a little disappointed in myself for not watching what I eat - El Fenix was not a great choice for lunch today - but it was a business lunch - did I care? Nope I ordered that big old Fiesta Burrito and ate a pound of chips and hot sauce - but it was SO good - but I am regretting it already. WHY do I do this to myself? WHY? Do y'all know how hard it is going to be for me tonight to workout with my bloated belly? I deserve it I know.

Well at least I have been good all week - oh wait I was not so good on Wednesday - Mexican food again for work with a customer - had a Taco Salad - WITH QUESO on top - yep that was me!

I guess I need to avoid Mexican Food all together. It seems to be a weakness for me.

Another funny thing has happened - I am craving CHOCOLATE - oodles of it. I like chocolate don't get me wrong - but since this workout thing has been going on I am craving it like CRAZY -I cannot get it out of my head. It is crazy. Oh well I guess I am just weird like that.

On the home front - all is good except for my control issues that I am trying to deal with - I realized just the other day that even though I am embracing this role as a working mom and trying to let the guilt go I cannot let the control go - you know the "house has to be this way, checkbook balanced, bills paid on time by ME, children have to be bathed like this and wear these PJ's, lunches are made like this and put in the fridge the night before - no you cannot put the freezer pack in until morning, the princess cannot wear those boots to school because they do not match her uniform outfit that I have already washed, folded and laid out for tomorrow, the dishes have to be done before bed - yes you must hand-wash that glass before bed or I will never sleep because I know it is there. WHEW - that makes me sound super crazy but I am that way y'all - it is BAD. I know. Scream at me, laugh at me, but this is my blog about looking at me - and unfortunately my reflection is not looking so smoking hot right now. I am searching my heart and trying to come up with a better solution. I have started an e-mail thred on my facebook and my eyes have been totally opened - these sweet sisters of mine have encouraged me and helped me and I found that I am not alone.
OKAY - more on that later. Any thoughts?
now I am hoping I get over the big lunch I ate so that tonight will be productive during my shred!


Jackiedlc said...

well if that is called control them i'm guilty too..

You have to understand that is something that comes with the territory of motherhood. We have to make sure things run not "our" way, but rather run. If we are not on top of things sometimes, they fall- because God designed us that way. For us to desire to manage these things... I don't think there is anything wrong with that right?

And the burrito stuff.. Get over it and make better choices next time :)lol.. feeling guilty wont take it away but shredding tonight will make it better :)

God bless stay pressing on :)

HD said...

I agree with Jackie--don't feel guilty, just work harder.

By the way, Jell-O has new mousse out, very chocolately and yummy...and guilt free!

Reflections in My Mirror said...

I am really searching my heart on these issues - my family is everything to me - but i loose precious time with them by making my house more like a business than a home - I have created a very high-stress zone for myself just by trying to control EVERY detail of the household. I shut out my husbands help because "he does not do it how I like it" I feel like Iam a total B at times - but we are working on it - we have a "date" scheduled tomorrow noght to really discuss things. He has already told me some things that I am still digesting. I am not trying to be too hard on myself - just a lot of self-realizations I guess.
I did my workout and now I want the mousse that HD talked about....

Reflections in My Mirror said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Cindy said...

I'm trying to make better food choices, and had some victory today...but I know it's hard.

Good luck on your journey...I'll be thinking about you.

StephF said...

I read somewhere that craving chocolate means you're low on magnesium. Do you take vitamins?

Reflections in My Mirror said...

Yes - I am on vitamins and I do Chinese Medicine for other things. I am better now and the Mouse ROCKS! Love that!