Psalm 33:20-21 (New International Version)
20 We wait in hope for the LORD;
he is our help and our shield.
21 In him our hearts rejoice,
for we trust in his holy name.
Waiting. I don't do that well. Last week was a test for me. Waiting on doctors to return my calls, waiting on test results, waiting on customers to call back with orders etc.
I was very negative last week. I war fearful for my son. I wanted to badly to know that he was OK. Why I could not have faith that God was in control and that I was doing a great job is beyond me. I had very little hope. I doubted the doctors that I have trusted for over 5 years now with my little one. I doubted that my son was healing.
I doubted that I would have any orders so that my numbers would increase. I had no hope that the economy was indeed getting better - at least in our region.
God was testing me. By Friday morning I had answers. Mason was healing and responding. I had 5 orders come in and more to bid this week.
Rejoice - It took some time to let it hit me. In fact if I really want to be honest here I did not rejoice until Mason woke up with visible signs that he was better. I did not really rejoice about work until I talked to my husband about it Sunday.
I am ashamed of that. I think that all of the negativity that has filtered into my life the last few weeks has hurt my hope and my faith.
The key word in the verse above is wait. WE WAIT IN HOPE. We are in a world that is instant - e-mails, faxes, Internet, chats and more tools that we have gives us instant data and instant "answers" but God wants us to wait. Let Him be the healer. Wait.
Then He wants us to REJOICE because we trust His holy name.
I am thankful that I have answers and that I have been blessed. Yesterday I held my babe and cuddled with him. I was thankful that he was getting better and that God has blessed me now with 2 years of him. Yes, he turned 2 yesterday! I read heart-wrenching stories of mommy's that have to say goodbye to their babies so early. God has blessed me with this child for two years! Time has gone quickly - but I am so proud to be his mommy. I said a prayer last night for him and for other mom's that might be hurting. I hope we all realize that there is hope. We are blessed. God is GOOD!
Praying that all of you have hope in your dark times.